Many men and women head to porn or online articles in their quest to discover how to have better sex. The problem is that porn isn’t real and learning “the theory” from a blog is no substitute to getting down and dirty in the bedroom.
If you’ve been in a relationship for a long time, it’s natural to feel like your sex life is getting a little…stale. When you’ve been doing things the same way for a long time, you can feel disconnected from your partner. What I call “mechanical sex” can easily take over.
So let’s bring back the fire! I’m going to outline one of my favourite ways to set the scene for a memorable night (or day!) of passion.
How to have better sex with your partner
Everyone knows that the build up to sex is all part of the fun. This good sex guide is for men that want to show their partner that they can still be romantic. So, find a babysitter or a minder for the dog and follow these steps to make her feel special and bring that excitement back to the bedroom.
1. Book a hotel
You want to plan an evening away from the family environment. Dirty dishes and the kids’ homework in eyesight are a guaranteed moodkill. There’s no need to book a hotel that blows the budget. The simple gesture of a night away is enough to show you’re making an effort to switch up your usual routine.
2. Book a hair/beauty appointment
Life can often get in the way of much-needed “me time” for us girls. Offer to book a hair or nail appointment, or treat her to a relaxing massage, so she feels as amazing as you know she looks!
3. Take her out to dinner
When you were younger, you were used to date nights in the back seat of the cinema. Now, your date night has taken a back seat of its own. But don’t panic! This is your evening to re-connect over a romantic meal at a restaurant you both love. Oysters followed by strawberries, anyone?
4. Make eye contact and touch her
Don’t neglect eye contact and gentle touches throughout the evening. Remember how handsy you both were at the beginning of your relationship? Remember how fun that was?! Show her how attractive she still is, with lingering eye contact and gentle touches of her waist, thigh and face. This also helps to build up anticipation of what’s to come later.
5. Cuddle her
Sometimes cuddling leads to sex; sometimes it doesn’t. And that’s perfectly fine! This night is all about going with the flow. If one of you isn’t in the mood to get sexy, a post-date night cuddle will bring you both closer and release that oxytocin, AKA “the love hormone”.
6. Watch a sexy movie
Watching porn as a couple doesn’t appeal to everyone. Of course, there are benefits to a shared porn experience – it helps you to accept that it’s okay for your partner to find other people sexually attractive and can be a great form of foreplay. But there are also cons – you could both be into different things.
Ease yourself in gently with an erotic movie instead. For some hot scenes that will definitely get you both in the mood, try Songs, Blue is the Warmest Colour or Killing me Softly.
7. Relieve the pressure to perform
As I already mentioned, be careful not to lay any pressure on this evening. If your partner feels like you’re expecting something, she might back away. Read her signals and let her know that you can both just take this time to relax if she prefers.
Whether you end up cuddling and laughing, engaging in foreplay, or having hours of great sex, it’s still a winner – right?
Try live bedroom coaching for couples
This might be something you’ve never considered before, but heaps of couples in Australia are turning to live bedroom coaching to figure out how to have better sex.
So what is it?
This is where a sex coach joins you in the bedroom. They don’t join in, but they guide you and teach you how to explore each other in new ways. If you’ve been wondering how to spice things up or how to communicate better between the sheets, live bedroom coaching breaks everything down and brings clarity to any sexual barriers you’ve got going on.
The best part of all is that this takes place in the comfort of your own home, so you can feel completely relaxed throughout the experience. Depending on your location, your sex coach can physically be in the bedroom, or this can take place virtually.
Every couple is different, so the session will be shaped around your needs, desires and goals. It could be centered around:
- Exploring tantric sex
- Sexual and emotional healing
- Learning or improving on erotic skills
- Nurturing the relationship
- Experimenting safely with fantasies
- Learning how to communicate with your partner
- Enhancing pleasure
- Overcoming sexual concerns, such as erectile dysfunction or a low libido
- Keeping the spice alive in long-term relationships
Does this sound like something that tickles your fancy? I understand that live sex coaching sounds like a big deal to couples that have never tried it before, so I welcome you to contact me to ask any questions about my methods and to make sure you’re comfortable with me first. Send me a quick SMS on 0410611917.
Ready to dive right in? AWESOME! Book your time slot here.