Hot Dog vs Cold Pussy

So, you’re a Dude and you want to have sex real bad but your woman has gone off it.

You know she’s gone cold because she’s: 

• avoiding sex
• pretending not to see your sexual advances
• may even outright push you away, or 
• say, “no thanks” more often than not

SHIT!

Anyway you look at this, it hurts. 

One of the worst things that can happen to a guy is to be sexually rejected by his woman. 

Unusually unconsciously, sexual rejection brings up all sorts of crap/trauma from boyhood and just generally knocks a man’s confidence and self-worth into the pits.

The great news is that the root causes of boyhood trauma can be healed (book in for a healing session if you’re ready for this level) but if you’re not quite ready for that, there are other things you can do in the meantime to reignite intimacy and passion in your relationship.

What’s a Guy to do?

In most cases, being tied into a romantic relationship with little or no sex is not healthy for the man or for the woman.

Intimacy is very important in a relationship. Healthy, consensual sex is key because sexual connection and release is important on every level; biologically, mentally and spiritually. Sex can even be a catalyst to fast-track personal development and spiritual awakening if you and your partner are ready for it.

But what do you do when your woman has slammed the door on sex and locked it up tight? 

It may be that she’s a workaholic or busy with kids and can remember how to get out of her head and into her sensual sexual body. It may be that you’re going about the initiating of things THE SAME way. The timing of things … oh boy there could be a million other reasons why she’s no longer hot for you but the one thing you need to know is IT’S YOUR JOB to fix this. 

It might be hard and it sort of sucks for you, but hey, YOU have to BE THE MAN and step up (because when you allow her to become the man/wear the pants in your relationship, your sexual polarity which causes the attraction, eventually dies).

Sex is GOOD

Please know this: wanting to have sex is a normal and healthy part of being a man. You biologically need to have sex. It feels amazing, releases tension, relaxes the body and aids sleep.

Men have evolved to want to procreate often. It’s how our species survives and thrives. You are wired to want it.

During beautiful consensual sex you are able to focus on the moment. For this brief window, your earthly responsibilities can melt away.  You will feel renewed strength to face all that awaits you.

Getting it is more complex these days than, say, caveman times – something we have also evolved into but it’s SO worth playing the game.

Stand by your sexual desire. It is an important part of you – a big part of what makes you a Man.

Don’t be a Pussy

This is happening to a lot of guys in this decade. Men are trying to get laid by being way too “NICE”. This isn’t a tit for tat thing.

YUCK!

Let her know that you love and want her very much but that you are not desperate. Please don’t be desperate or too needy and sulky for sex. 

Don’t beg. 

You’re both all in – that’s the goal – that’s when sex sings, becomes something primal and spiritual. 

Hallelujah!!!!

Make it Fun

When you get “rejected” by your partner, it’s key not to get angry, mope, beg, be unnaturally nice, or be sad. I know this sounds old fashioned, but, BE A MAN ABOUT IT. Accept the feedback and then let the rejection roll off of you like water off a duck’s back.

You can do this in many ways:

• Make a joke about it with her. Tease. Be light. Be playful.
• Instead of feeling hurt, surprise her with one of her favorite physical treats like a foot massage or run her a bath (no strings attached). 
• Show her how you understand what she’s feeling and let her know that you are there for her anyway because you are her MAN. Ask her what she needs right now and be calm and supportive no matter what she says. This works over time!
• If you really love her, you’ll need to be patient with your partner. You can’t change another person, you can only change yourself. 
• Let her know you’ll be here when she’s ready.

In the meantime you do YOU with confidence.

 

Be an attractive MAN

Have you let yourself slip with age? How do you look and feel in your body?

What hopes and dreams have you been putting off “for the relationship/for the family”?

Some Tips:

Follow your dreams – get that motorcycle or tattoo you’ve been putting off for so long. Start that band or whatever your equivalent is. A man living his dreams is HOT!

Look good –  shower, shave, dress well, smell like a million bucks

Feel good – move your body, surf, run, ride your bike, lift some weights, whatever is your thing. Get moving. 

Upskill – Learn more about how to touch your woman, be a better lover there is so much more no doubt you could learn to attract your partner.

Do these things over time and you’ll feel great! Feeling good and being in your power is super attractive to your woman (and to other women too – which will certainly make your woman pay attention to you!).

Know your Breaking Point

If you are reading this, it shows that you are making an effort to evolve into an even more amazing lover. If you are doing some of these things. You deserve a loving relationship and great sex. You are a good catch and there is a love match out there for you. It may be with our current partner, or hey maybe it may be with another woman.

But before you go throwing out the baby with the bathwater by getting rid of your woman and hooking up with another (and most likely repeating the same pattern all over again), here’s some advice. 

When awakening your inner MAN you must be patient with yourself and allow yourself time to grow into the confident sexual being that you are. Practice makes perfect. Learn how to be a better lover. As you try out new concepts you’ll learn and grow. Pay attention to the outcome of your experiments. Take the feedback you get like you are a curious scientist. This will take some time but can be a whole lot of fun.

Saying that, at some point you will feel the change within you and if you have worked on yourself first and then you have asked the question to your partner …’ Are you willing to be intimate again? Even if you both don’t know how this will look but BOTH ARE WILLING. Then this is the start!

However, if the answer is NO. How long can you fully live and thrive in a sexless or sexually unfulfilling relationship? Only you know the answer to that one. Maybe there needs to be a change.  Your confidence in this will be as good for you as it will be for her. 

Game worth playing

Invite her to come with you on a sexual expansion together. Learn Tantra, see a Sex Therapist or Intimacy Coach.  When she takes your hand and says “yes” to you with all of her heart, Together you can learn to experience heaven on earth.  This is a power, a Magick, that changes the world – one couple at a time.